WritesSave the Datereader Leslie:
I was engaged three years ago and started planning a wedding—with three longtime girlfriends as my bridesmaids—but the wedding was called off.After that happened,I moved across the country and have barely seen those three friends since.
Fast-forward to now,and I'm newly engaged to another man and couldn't be happier.I have new friends who are close with both me and my fiance,and I'd love to include them in my wedding party.I'm still friends with my old bridesmaids,but we're not nearly as close.If the first engagement had never happened,I wouldn't remotely be considering them as bridesmaids.But since they were bridesmaids last time,I think they all assume they will be this time around.I'm not sure how to approach this with them.Help!
Here are my thoughts:
I know it's a sticky situation,but I don't think brides should hand out wedding party invites out of a sense of obligation.I think you should address the situation with your old friends ASAP—then ask your new friends to be your bridesmaids.
Maybe you could ask the old friends to do a three-part reading together,so they still get a place of honor.
I'd just email them and say,"We're keeping our wedding party to people who we're both close with,but I'd still like you to be a part of our wedding." Maybe they'll be a little miffed—but maybe they're already on the same page as you.In any event,you'll probably have to compromise on plenty of other things in regards to your wedding;I don't think you need to compromise on this.
Ladies,what do you think?Should Leslie ask her old bridesmaids to be in her wedding party again?Or can she get away with not including them?
Have a wedding-y dilemma of your own?Email me!